I Offered You Soup and You Didn't Want It

Because of you I feel ugly. I bundle myself up in blankets, even when it’s not cold outside. I just don’t want to see the day. I wonder what people see in me. I make excuses for myself. I meditate on every last second we spent together and I deconstruct where I could’ve made things better. I could’ve, right? I walk down the street judging other women because I’m wondering which one you’re loving besides me. I can’t watch romantic movies because who the hell do they think they are? I fear other men. I cry out loud because I want you to hear. I want you to be there. You used to. I used to make you cry too. And I would drown myself in your tears.

Jade Brown